Vineria all'Amarone, Venice.  Photo: Amy Bown

Vineria all'Amarone, Venice. Photo: Amy Bown

Consumer: Food, Beverage & Fun

Bass Ale 


This radio campaign for Bass Ale was targeted specifically to the Boston market. I came up with a number of humorous scripts that made fun of the historically tetchy relationship between Boston and England. 

Radio: "What goes down well"


First, Britain gave Boston taxation without representation. 


But that didn't go down so well.  Then, they threw us a Tea Party. 


But that didn't go down so well either.  

Next, they sent us all those funny-looking teenagers with tattoos and spiky hair.  


And that didn't go down well AT ALL (except for in Cambridge).

Finally, they sent us Bass Ale.


Which went down SO well, it is now the number one selling import ale in Boston. Brewed from England's purest mineral-rich streams, with the finest natural ingredients. Bass Ale is the ONE thing the Red Coats gave us that's easy to swallow. Every single time. 

Bass Ale. Guinness makes it. Boston drinks it. 

Darien Lake Theme Park and Camping Resort

Darien Lake Travel Guide ad

Darien Lake Travel Guide ad

Radio: "Summer School"


Everybody knows that Darien Lake is fun for the whole family. But did you know it's educational too? Listen to these guys recite their vowels.  Gimme an "A"!  (KIDS SCREAMING ON COASTER: AYYYYYYYYYYYYY!)



Can I have an "O" please? (RELUCTANT ADULT: OH. OH. OH. UH-OH! SPLASSSSSH!)

With 100 rides and attractions, you don't have to ask "Y" Darien Lake is the place to "B"! (KIDS: EWWWWWWWW!)

Annnndddd...there's the "U"!  

Darien Lake, New York's largest theme park and camping resort.  It's like summer school for the whole family. 

Eastman Kodak Consumer Digital Imaging 

Radio: "Unidentified Feline Object"

Salesguy:            Welcome to Kodak Digital Imaging Center.  How can I help you?

Customer:           I'd like to make this photo into a gift for the UFO Society.

Salesguy:             You've come to the right place sir.  Uh...what's this a picture of, anyway?

Customer:          This is a photo of an extraterrestrial in my backyard.

Salesguy:           (Dubious) Uh-huh.

Customer:         Note little body. Big head. Buggy eyes.  And acting all kinds of shady. 

Salesguy:          I hate to rain on your intergalactic parade, sir, but I do believe that's a cat. 

Customer:        A cat?

Salesguy:         'Fraid so.

Anncr:             With Kodak Digital Imaging Center, you can turn your photos into gifts like cards, books, albums, and more!

Customer :     (DARKLY) That cat's messin' with my mind.

Salesguy:       They'll do that, sir. 

Anncr:            Kodak Digital Imaging Solutions. Take Pictures Further. 

Nature's Pleasure's Apple Slices

This was a product launch for pre-sliced, naturally flavored apple slices that were convenient for Mom and a healthy snack for the family. Each flavor had a different story from "A. Apple" on the package. The copy was written for kids, so it was fun, corny and pun-filled--which is what writers live for! 



Do you have a project coming up? Let's talk. Contact me or email